I want the world to know how great Jesus is, what he can do in your life if you let him. Yet I hold back, not allowing that finally bit. I heard a good podcast by the guys over at ComeandLive.com, in one part of it, they mention when Abraham took Issac up to the mountain to be sacrificed. Almost every time I hear about this story it is about how faithful Abraham was that he was willing to sacrifice his own son for God. And it is true that Abraham was extremely faithful but what they mention I had not thought of before.
Issac was God's promise. Abraham waited a very long time to have this promise fulfilled. So long that he doubted God and had sex with one of his servants which produced Ishmael. (By the way, in the Jewish, it is Yishma'el meaning God pays attention or God hears.) But God wasn't done with his plan, and gave Abraham and Sarah, Issac. (On another side note, Sarah used to be called Sarai. I have heard many times that both mean princess. One thing said it might be the difference of the changing of the dialects of Ur and Canaan, but as I was using the Complete Jewish Bible, with Jewish names and meanings in it, it said that Sarai meant mockery. She was a mockery because she couldn't have kids, but then went to being a princess when God fulfilled his plan in her life. Thought that was pretty cool.)
What the guys in the podcast had mentioned was that when Issac was strapped down to the altar, not only was Abraham showing obedience, but also that God needed Abraham to remove Issac from the front of his heart, where God belongs. Abraham waited many years to have the son God promised, he was one hundred years old and Sarah was in her 90's. God has to be first, even over family. With Abraham willing to let God be first, he was able to turn him from a great father, to a father of many nations. He went from being a influential person in Jewish history, to being an influential person in many parts of the world, and his line would eventually give us Jesus.
I am not good at this, I try as hard as I can, but I am afraid to but that final bit of me away and put only God in my heart. It is so hard. I doubt I would be as faithful as Abraham. But I hope to. We put so much stock in ourselves, in our looks, in our money, in the things we own, and the things we think we own. We build up our dreams so that we can be something. But God wants to take your dreams away, kill them. He wants to put his plan in its place. Not that he doesn't want you to have your dreams, but His plan is so much better. He wants to give you every one of your dreams, in His way, not yours.
I want to do this, put him first, his plan and live out his story. I will fail. I am only human after all, but even in my failure, God is mighty. I want to stop with my swearing, stop with my anger, I want to fight all of the urges that make up me, so that I can be like Jesus. I pray that I can do it, I will try. I want to be able to love those people I don't want to love. I want to love and not hate so much. Life is not that great with so much hate. In time maybe I can do this. In time maybe we can all do this. We need to stop being in the news for our hate, and be in the news for our love. If we can show people that God loves them so much, then they can stop trying to find love in the darkness of this world. But first let's learn to love.
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