With my vast experience of being a ninja, breaking into places not even James Bond could get into, I have learned one very important thing. You see when I was younger, I traveled a lot for my job. I would often find myself in strange places, where most people would not feel comfortable even driving past.
Every time I would go somewhere, I would take only the necessities. I had my sword, my gear, a dozen stars, and whatever else I would need. I had made many journeys over the years, dark forests, dank caves and even a castle or two. It was always hard to plan ahead for the unknown, but I got good at it. The most important thing in all the world to take with you, no matter if you were fighting Ninjas, zombies, wizards, goblins, or giants, and it was the key to survival anywhere, was Bacon. Yes you read that right, Bacon. Bacon is the greatest thing mankind had ever made. With enough bacon, there would be no wars, no famine, hate would be erased, and maybe even the dead raised.
So when you leave today, make sure you stop and get some bacon (That is providing that you do not already have a stash saved up). If you want to save a life, or be the talk of the town, take some bacon. If you get abducted by aliens, avoid having the world over run by offereing them some bacon.
I truly believe with all my heart, ALL great civilizations fell because of a shortage of bacon. Do not let this happen again.
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