Deep Waters

If you know me, you know that I have been using the CJB version of the bible; That is, the Complete Jewish Bible. Now despite the name, which I am aware of some having issues with the "complete" giving a connotation that the Jewish Bible is not complete. But I am not here to talk about that. What I am here for is to talk about how it has given me insights and/or ideas that had not occurred to me before.

For example, pretty much everyone knows the Great Commission given by Jesus, but as a reminder,

"Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit." -Matthew 28:19

 When we think of baptizing, we always think of water. Well maybe not always as that my brain went directly to baptizing by fire, but you know what I mean. That is one of the big words for Christians. Heck whole denominations are based around it. Theologies and lives are centered around the water and how it should be done. But alas, I am not here to debate the merits of immersion, sprinkling, and whatever else there may be.

This verse also brings to mind a guy name John. Yep that crazy guy from the desert, wearing camel hair and eating locust and preparing the way of the Lord, "Behold He comes riding on the clouds, Shining like the sun at the trumpet..." There is an earworm for you, and also leaving off unresolved, I am a jerk. Anyways, John was called the Baptist because he was baptizing people. Very original name if you ask me...

In the CJB John is not called John, nor is he called The Baptist. He is called Yochanan. Yochanan is just John after translating it back to the Hebrew. I like the CJB because it uses easy (sorta) to pronounce Jewish names. Y'hudah for Judah, Yarden for Jordan, you might see a pattern with those J to Y's. They also do not use the word Baptist. John is Yochanan the Immerser. John would immerse the people who came to him in the waters of the Jordan River. Ding one for dunking. Wait...

So back to the verse in Matthew, Mattityahu in case you are curious, the CJB changes it up a little bit.

Therefore, go and make people from all nations into talmidim, immersing them into the reality of the Father, the Son, and the Ruach HaKodesh"

Ok, first of, Talmidim are disciples and Ruach HaKodesh is the Holy Spirit. But what got me was "Immersing them into the reality of..." I like that. So often someone might come to know Jesus, but while they are still young, we leave them to their own devices and they eventually stray away. Or we force too much onto them too quickly and they run because people are pushy.

But what if we were to immerse them. But let's ignore them for a moment. The bigger question I want to ask is this; What if we immerse ourselves in the reality of God? What if we actually let our day to day lives be filled with God. What if we learned to love like God does, give without thought of ourselves, and completely be like Jesus? If we were immersed in God, maybe we might not have a stigma about the Christian faith that turns people away.

How can we turn an eye to the homeless and needy, pretend they do not exist, if we were immersed in God? Being immersed would be every minute we are reaching out to God for direction and for peace. It would completely envelope our lives and we we might truly see God working.

In Isaiah (Yesha 'yahu if you were wondering) God was talking to Israel, "I am doing something new, it's springing up - can't you see it? I am making a road in the desert, rivers in the wasteland."

If we were immersed, we would be able to see this. We would see the roads laid before us, the rivers to rest by, this darkened world would be made a light and we could do everything God wants for us. But for now, most of us are not immersed, I know I always fight to keep my head above the waters, never fully letting myself go under. Stuck somewhere in remembering the past and living day by day, never really thinking of the future, nor of where should be, and where God has been pushing me. I am not immersed.

And it does get me thinking, what if I do let myself be fully immersed into the reality of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit? What would my life look like then? Would I be able to also immerse others as well? Would I have that wholly original name of The Immerser? I could. I keep praying that I will finally give in, and let go. I know his ways are so much better, but I do not want to let go of myself. So maybe I should just say, "I'm Diving in, I'm going deep, in over my head I want to be, lost in the rush, tossed in the flow, in over my head I want to go." That is Steven Curtis Chapman by the way. And one more song quote here by Attalus, "Faith is leap, but its a dance, as soon as you hit the surface."

Sharing In Joy

I have this sadness in my heart sometimes. It comes from different things, but it feels the same way. One example of the feeling, is when someone shows me something they are very proud about, whether it was something they made, or they bought, it is something they are happy to show off. I look at the said item and I think to myself "That's dumb, why should I care about this?" Then when I look back I feel a small pang of guilt, but also a sadness in me. I am sure this has to do with my depression that fights its way up time and time again, and I kick it back down each time.

Interestingly it is the same feeling when I am on the other side of this. I just got something, and am excited about it, and then someone makes a comment that is not mean or hurtful, but more of a dismissive or sometimes even looking down on you because they do not agree with what you did.

For example, I recently bought a Surface Pro 4, which I am typing on at the moment of writing this. I was excited to get it and wanted to show it off to the couple people at work that might also like it. I wanted to show off some of the cool features it can do. I personally love this little tablet. But when I had it at work, someone made a comment, that might not have been condescending, but it sounded like it. I do not remember exactly what was said, but basically they made a comment about putting something like this on a charge just after paying it off.

Then I felt this regret type of sadness which is the same way I feel when I am not excited about something someone else is. I want to share in their joy, in my head at least, but because I am a bit judgmental of things myself, I have a hard time finding that joy. Because I am not a father, and who knows when I might be, I wonder how it is when your child runs up to you with a horrible looking picture, smiling and is so very excited to give you this thing. Will I feel this regret/guilt sadness when I think back about it, or am I going to treasure it?

I am sure I will treasure it. I have so many little treasures in my room from people or silly moments and yet will always have room for more. Like a little rubber ducky that my sister gave to me last time she visited. I have no need for a rubber ducky, but since it was black she thought of me, and now it sits on my desk. I look at it, I feel happy, and I miss my little sister. Shh, don't tell her.

I know in my heart, this is the feeling I should be having when someone brings up something they just have to have and are so excited about it. I want to feel happy and smile with them because they are happy. For me it is really hard to feel really happy for someone else sometimes. Heck its hard to feel really happy for myself most of the time, but I want to keep working on these things. It is a hard thing when we are stuck only in our heads. I want to share in the joy of the small moments, the happiness in the small things with the people I share a world with.

I want to fill my life up with more joy. Joy in my friends, in my family, so that there is no more regret/guilt in my life. I want to learn to be happy in all the small things and large things, the good things and the bad things. I think that if we allow ourselves to experience and share in the joy with each other maybe we can get a glimpse of what it could be like not being stuck inside this fleshy prison.

It is the season of joy after all. Where we stop thinking about ourselves for a little while and start thinking about others. While tracing the etymology of Joy around I found that it is from the PIE root of gau- meaning "To Rejoice" Rejoice literally means to be glad again. Joir meaning be glad, and the prefix re-, again. Maybe this season we can work on being glad again so that we can pass the joy and happiness to the next person and then the next.

Paul told us to "Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep." Maybe we should really do this, open our hearts emotionally to each other so that maybe we can get a tiny, but more complete taste of what the Love of God is like.